Description |
Size |
The Accountancy Shanty |
179K |
Mrs. Moore's contractions are more frequent, doctor! Good. Take her into the Fetus Frightening Room. Right. |
11K |
And get the machine that goes Ping!!! |
7K |
Hallo. Now, don't you worry. We'll soon have you cured. Leave it all to us. You'll never know what hit you. |
17K |
Ah, I see you have the machine that goes Ping!!!! |
7K |
Is it a boy or a girl? Now, I think it's a little early to start imposing roles on it, don't you? |
14K |
So, it's lots of happy pills for you, and you can find out all about the birth when you get home. It's available on Betamax, VHS, and Super Eight. |
22K |
I've got no option but to sell you all for scientific experiments |
10K |
Blame the Catholic Church for not letting me wear one of those little rubber things. |
8K |
If they'd let me wear one of those little rubber things on the end of my cock, we wouldn't be in the mess we are now. |
13K |
Couldn't you have your balls cut off? |
4K |
Every time they have sexual intercourse, they have to have a baby. But it's the same with us, Harry. What do you mean? Well, I mean, we've got two children, and we've had sexual intercourse twice. |
29K |
I mean, because we are members of the Protestant Reformed Church, which successfully challenged the autocratic power of the Papacy in the mid-sixteenth century, we can wear little rubber devices to prevent issue |
21K |
I can wear whatever I want on my John Thomas,... [sniff] ...and, Protestantism doesn't stop at the simple condom! Oh, no! I can wear French Ticklers if I want. You what? French Ticklers. Black Mambos. Crocodile Ribs. Sheaths that are designed not only to protect, but also to enhance the stimulation of sexual congress. Have you got one? |
50K |
Harry, I want you to sell me a condom. In fact, today I think I'll have a French tickler for I am a Protestant |
14K |
Despite the attempts of Protestants to promote the idea of sex for pleasure, children continued to multiply everywhere. |
19K |
Now did I, or did I not ... do ... vaginal... juices? Yes sir |
17K |
R-- rubbing the clitoris, sir? What's wrong with a kiss, boy? Hmm? Why not start her off with a nice kiss? |
21K |
You don't have to go leaping straight for the clitoris like a bull at a gate. |
10K |
So, we have all these possibilities before we stampede toward the clitoris |
17K |
We'll take the foreplay as read |
7K |
Dont stand there gawping like you've never seen the hand of God before |
12K |
During the night old Perkins got hit leg bitten sort of...off |
14K |
Why are you dressed as a tiger? |
5K |
Tiger brand coffee, is a real treat. Even tigers prefer a cup of it to real meat |
10K |
God told us to do it. To tell the truth, we are completely mad. |
9K |
We're inmates of a Bengali psychiatric institution and we escaped by making this skin out of old used cereal packets |
17K |
Hello, good evening, and welcome to the middle of the film |
12K |
Find the fish. |
5K |
I wonder where that fish has gone? |
12K |
And it went whereever I did go |
12K |
Live organ transplants |
6K |
Hello, can we have your liver? |
6K |
What's this then? A liver donors card. Need we say more? |
10K |
I can't give it to you now. It says, 'in the event of death'. Uh. Oh! No one who has ever had their liver taken out by us has survived. |
22K |
People aren't wearing enough hats |
6K |
The entire "Isn't it awfully nice to have a penis" song from the restaurant scene |
100K |
Better get a bucket, I'm gonna throw up!! |
8K |
And now, how would you like it served? All, uh, mixed up togezer in a bucket? |
11K |
don't skimp on the pate. |
5K |
And finally, monsieur, a wafer-thin mint. Nah. Oh, sir, it's only a tiny, little, thin one. No. Fuck off. I'm full. |
23K |
It's only wafer thin! |
5K |
I couldn't eat another thing, I'm absolutely stuffed. |
8K |
F**k you, I can live my life in my own way if I want to |
10K |
You have been convicted by twelve good persons and true... of the crime of first degree making of gratuitous, sexist jokes in a moving picture. |
26K |
Mr. Death is a reaper. The Grim Reaper!!! Hardly surprising in this weather. Ha Ha Ha! |
21K |
I am death. |
8K |
I have come for you. You mean... to-- Take you away. |
25K |
Well, that's cast rather a gloom over the evening, hasn't it? |
8K |
Well, you're dead now, so shut up! |
11K |
You barge in here, quite uninvited, break glasses, and then announce, quite casually, that we're all dead. |
14K |
Englishmen, you're all so fucking pompous |
12K |
none of you have got any balls |
8K |
How can we all have died at the same time? [Dramatic Chord] The salmon mousse |
21K |
Well, that's the end of the film. Now, here's the meaning of life. Thank you, Brigitte. M-hmm. Well, it's nothing very special. Uh, try and be nice to people, avoid eating fat, read a good book every now and then, get some walking in, and try and live together in peace and harmony with people of all creeds and nations |
48K |
Family entertainment bollocks!! What they want is filth: people doing things to each other with chainsaws during tupperware parties, babysitters being stabbed with knitting needles by gay presidential candidates, vigilante groups strangling chickens, armed bands of theatre critics exterminating mutant goats... |
36K |